


Lost Loves And Memories

by Jen425



Series: Influences [5]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars: Rise of Empire Era - All Media Types
Genre: Anakin Skywalker Needs a Hug, Fix-It of Sorts, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-26
Updated: 2019-02-26
Packaged: 2019-11-06 03:57:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 652
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17932409
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jen425/pseuds/Jen425
Summary: Malii misses zir partners.So does Anakin.





	Lost Loves And Memories

**Author's Note:**

> I have decided that Malii is the same species as Ej-Loo. Anyways, hey. Long time no see.

Every day, Malii thinks of her. zir Kelna.

 

But searching for Kelna and the rest of the evacuated healing wing is… dangerous. Skywalker hasn’t gone in search of Master Kenobi or the Senator or even Padawan Tano. Malii, at least, has Nat.

 

Nat is… she is too young to deal with this, but she’s too old to be innocent. And Malii… ze just…

 

The Clone Wars was  _ ending. _ ze hadn’t thought that ze would have to take care of Nat through  _ this _ . ze will, of course, ze’s not cruel, and Nat is (was) Ria’s  _ Padawan _ , was so  _ excited  _ about it, and so was Ria…

 

Blast it! Everything about this is still… impossible to believe.

 

Ria is dead.

 

Kelna is so far away…

 

Malii sighs. The saferoom is protected for now, but…

 

“Malii.”

 

Malii starts at the low voice behind zir. Why Sidious let Anakin’s vocoder shut off on command was simple beyond zir, but it honestly was even more terrifying.

 

“Anakin,” ze says. “I’m sorry, I was just thinking…”

 

A laugh, of sorts.

 

“It’s no problem,” Anakin says. “I’m not unaware of how terrifying I appear. What were you thinking about?”

 

Malii sighs.

 

“Kelna, if I’m honest,” ze says. “I worry for her group.”

 

“Don’t worry,” Anakin says. “Darth Vader is on her case personally, and I never succeed.”

 

Malii laughs, shaking zir head.

 

“I’ll give it this,” ze says. “Sometimes, knowing the real reason behind Darth Vader’s incompetency is fun.”

 

Anakin just shakes his head.

 

“Glad someone thinks so,” he says.

 

Ah. Yes. Master Windu and his glares in Anakin’s direction mixed with questions about him. Some genuine, some suspicious.

 

Malii sighs.

 

“Change doesn’t come overnight,” ze says. “And you were under his thumb for moments.”

 

“But I couldn’t kill children,” Anakin says. “Especially yours.”

 

Malii smiles.

 

“Deak in particular idolizes you,” ze says. “In another life, I might have called in Kelna’s favor to make him your Padawan.”

 

Anakin just shakes his head.

 

“That life split off even before you might think,” he says. “I swore to take no Padawans after what the Council did to Ahsoka.”

 

Malii just laughs.

 

“Exactly why I said I’d need a favor,” ze explains. “I have complete faith in my kids’ skills.”

 

Anakin turns to zir. Ze  _ thinks _ he’s smiling, but it really is impossible to tell.

 

“I’m sure,” he says. “But I must go and speak to my  _ Master _ .”

 

He visibly droops.

 

“Please,” he says. “Keep the kids from my room, this time.”

 

Malii laughs. Despite how serious and terrifying it had been at the time, Deak running to Anakin when he’d hurt himself was actually kind of adorable in retrospect.

 

“I’ll try my best,” ze says. “Good luck.”

 

Anakin nods.

 

“I’ll need it, today,” he says, and… oh. Right. Today is the anniversary of the Duchess’ death.

 

“I’m sorry,” Malii says as if those words are enough.

 

They’ll never be enough.

 

Anakin just waves his hand.

 

“It doesn’t matter,” he says. “I will return soon.”

  
  
  


Anakin would breath a sigh of relief if he could as he leaves the hidden rooms. On this day, he really just wants to be alone, but he has duties and responsibilities.

 

And Sidious never wastes an opportunity to break him further.

 

So he forces the internal mask of Vader on, the roiling waves of Darkness and grief.

 

It’s been two years, shouldn’t it be easier by now?

 

But it isn’t. He can still remember. Obi-Wan’s heartbroken face when he’d returned. Alone.

 

A final conversation that he had never expected to be their last. Rushed goodbyes with expected tomorrows.

 

Anger. At Obi-Wan, for not saving her. Just like he hadn’t wanted him saving his mother, had talked him out of it until he ran there  _ too late _ …

 

He doesn’t blame Obi-Wan, not anymore, but… it hurts.

 

Especially today.

 

And, as the hologram lights, Anakin readies himself for emotional torture.

 

By one who had once been his friend.

**Author's Note:**

> What’s especially funny about Malii’s musings is that Deak actually does end up being Anakin’s Padawan in GT
> 
> Tumblr: @flaim-ita
> 
> Pillowfort: Flaim


End file.
